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By: Raven BlackRose~

Your silence spoke words I didn’t want to hear.
Words I had shut out while I still hung on
to that thread that became thinner and thinner.
I watched as it slipped through my fingers.
Still I clung to what I knew was just a fantasy
until I could bear my own lies no longer.

I let go…

Through tear filled eyes I watched in sadness
as you drifted further and further away.
Not once looking back.
Not once did you reach for the hand
that was still there
Still reaching out to you in one last
attempt at unrealistic hope.

Eventually it was lowered
to hang loosely at my side.
This is when the silence moved in
that deafening, vibrating, feel it in your bones
drown out the sound of your own heart beat
silence.

It hit me with a rush of all the reality
I had worked so hard to ignore
knocking the breath from my lungs
sending me to my knees.

I lay my head upon the floor
curling into that comforting
fetal position that we all seek
when everything around us
comes crashing down upon us
like a stone wall crumbling
and I let my tears flow
until there were no more.

I did not drown…

I lay there for a while
gathering my strength
until I found my darkness
and I embraced it
pulling it tightly around me
like the arms that I could no longer feel.

I cried even more
as the darkness held me
comforting me
until I had nothing left inside
and I lay there waiting.

Through tear-stained eyes I watched
as I once again began to fade
back into the fantasy
I was before you demanded
my reality.

My fingers found and curled into the
soft fur of the wolf
finding comfort there.
The raven scolded my weakness
cawing nevermore.
And I repeated.

Nevermore…